Scorpio – October 23 – November 22

 

     Scorpio the ScorpionScorpio Symbol

Scorpio the Scorpion

Scorpio the Scorpion

  • Symbiotic animal – Parasitic Wasp
  • Spiritual Appliance – Butterball meat injector
  • Symbolic Handtool – Baseball bat
  • Spiritual Stone – Hot lava

Scorpio is all about power and self-mastery. They are intense, profound and frequently possess a hypnotic personality. Blessed with volcanic emotions, they may seem ready to blow at any moment. They are spooky. At heart a noble soul, Scorpio wants to give to others. What is given isn’t always welcome. Scorpio often has many psychic abilities. They can be excellent at diagnosis of illness, detecting emotional weakness, spotting character flaws, divining shoddy past lives among others. They generally have very strong likes and dislikes and with a generous heart let all know what they hate. This list can be extensive. In many instances paranoia embraces Scorpio. On the extreme side, they can take down friends and enemies alike if they sense betrayal. On the plus side, they unselfishly dispatch them as quickly and painlessly as possible. Known to be a robust lover and greatly appreciated by those that can keep up, little is said of their sensitive side, very little. Jealousy can be a strong Scorpio trait. If romantically involved don’t take a chance and lie to a Scorpio. If you do, change your name and move to a 3rd world country. Plastic surgery is strongly suggested. If you marry a Scorpio, it not unlike like joining the Mafia – there’s only one way out. Scorpio often have large families, pumping out babies like nobody’s business. They can be over protective and are commonly found arguing with their child’s grade school teacher or barricaded in their home surrounded by a police SWAT squad. Do not cross a Scorpio, if they don’t get you, their progeny will. Self-deception and fanatical devotion are some of your most endearing qualities.
Preferred career paths; Marriage counselor, evangelical minister, pro-wrestler, psychic advisor, taxidermist, sex trade specialist, step-mother.

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