Dream Interpretation offers rare opportunity

By  | Filed under: Money Talks

Dreamscape Cranial Diagram There’s money in them thar’ lobes! Big money according to some. Dream interpretation is becoming the next big thing! As big as EST was in the ’70’s, spirit channeling in the ’80’s, investing in the stock market in the ’90’s? Bigger and more lucrative is the answer. Why? Everyone dreams. Whether they want to admit it or not. “EST was early psycho babble. Channeling? Who wants some grumpy 5000 year old Sanskrit priest in their living room? Or a Druid who drinks baby blood? It’s unappealing and truly distasteful.” says Beverly Hills oneirologist, Dreamy Draw. “The’90’s ‘internet bubble’ was a crazy mass dream.  but the ‘real estate bubble’ was a national nightmare we’re all trying to wake-up from.” One happy note? The individual dream market is wide open and ready to be monetized. The internet, Facebook, twitter, etc and you have a vast untapped audience. But how? It can’t be packaged and put on a shelf. “30 years ago there were few acupuncturists. Who would of thunk people would pay to have needles stuck in them?” says Draw. There are basic interpreters or dream sayers, that advise the dreamer on the meanings of their dreams. Generally what your sub-conscious is trying to tell you. But why now? Many people feel stuck in their lives and need some guidance. With all the psychic rip-offs out there, who better to trust but yourself….and your own dreams….And for those in the know, a vast untapped audience.

“Dream interpretation has been with us for millennia. The greats, Napoleon, Attila the Hun, Richard Nixon, Johnny Rotten consulted soothsayers to have their dreams interpreted. Many people feel stuck in their lives and need some guidance. With all the rip-offs out there, who better to trust but yourself….and your own dreams.” says Draw. 

What about the interpretations? They must be all over the place? Not so, says, the head of oneirology (study of dreams) at the Sappho School Of Dream Interpretation. Dr. Miles Walker explains, “We advise everyone to make sure to use a certified, licensed sayer, so you can avoid the usual scams.” What’s a dream scam? “A simple scam would be – Oh, that dream means you should give me all your money –  most people wouldn’t buy that interpretation, but some would,” says Walker. “Our therapists are ethically trained in Biblical, Freudian, Jungian, existential, multi-cultural interpretations. Most specialize as to what their main interest is, but they can refer to any number of interpretations according to the patients needs and belief system.” states Dr. Walker.

Not everyone is suited to be a dream therapist. Another angle on dream interpretation is the growing craft of dream videos, ala the feature film, Inception. No one enters your dream, but a dreamographer tries to create the dream as told by the dreamer himself. According to the budget, these dreamographers try to bring the dream to life using stock footage and recreations. Critics charge that these dream home movies are mere approximations of the dreamers sketchy memory. They are dangerous because they can replace the real dream in the clients sub-conscious. They could become nightmares instead. Others complain dream vids are mere toys of the wealthy, some having large budgets and cast with famous movie stars. “Like owning a Ferrari or a Picasso, a dream vid with Bruce Willis or the Kardashians in it is more about ego than therapy or enlightenment.”
A different kind dreamographer, a SRT (Sub-conscious Rem Technician), uses cutting edge technology to decipher the brains electric impulses during the dream state and creates a rough visual record, they call Subcon Streaming. Critics refer to it as Remorama. The dreamer inputs their personal info with any photographs, home movies, favorite TV shows, music, etc. They combine this with a huge library of archetypal images and audio. While the customer or remmer is dreaming the brain impulses trigger a complex set of algorithms that informs the computer what images to pull and assemble. In no time at all an audio visual dream is produced. Crazy, huh? “If we can create a software that can beat a chest master, we can do a dream.” says one SRT.
While hardly comparable, the Subcon Streaming success rate (happy customers) and relative low cost is the envy of every dream entrepreneur. Subcon Streaming Franchises are selling at a fast clip. Some are pushing for private insurance and Medicare to cover the cost of a Dream Stream once every 1 to 2 years. “A good mental attitude helps physical health.  Nightmares, tormenting and confusing dreams do not produce a healthy happy contented person. It will save us money in the long run.” claims one pro-dream streamer.

The forgotten dream? How many scientists, inventors and artists claim that they have received inspiration from their dreams. How many solutions have been  lost because they forgot their dream. There is a budding side business in Dream Resurrections. The remmer resurrectionist guides the patient to a forgotten dream that could have that valuable inspiration. Whether this has produced anything of value has yet to be seen. Though it has been reported that many customers enjoy revisiting their dreams.

Critics claim many of these streams are a ridiculous jumble of music and images. More like an ’80’s rock video than a dream. Anti-streamers cite there have been few studies produced that can back it’s efficacy. While the technology that exists in the movie, Inception, isn’t available, the dark side of dream streaming is out there. Various high-tech security firms are offering streaming services to large corporations and government security services. Critics claim they soon will be able to load your brain with psychotropic drugs and feed you a dream stream that could amplify your desires, fears, weaknesses, etc. Your sub-conscious filled with images and messages from others could distort your conscious action in ways that would make it easier to control you. There is the possibility to create an informer or an assassin out of an average Joe. Wall street types could use it to manipulate markets to their own advantage. No one returned my calls when I referenced several of the top international security firms. I did corner a worker for an unnamed firm. He refused to give his name and became angry when I mentioned some of the dictators and oppressive governments that they provide streaming services to.
“It’s better than water boarding! Some of them even like it!” he blurted out. Several security guards escorted me away from the buildings entrance before I could offer any follow up questions.
Outside corporate and authoritarian manipulation what benefit is Dream Streaming to the average person? Your dreams works sub-consciously, trying to help you work out the challenges in your daily life. What are the effects when you bring this process into the conscious mind? Examine it? Watch it over and over again? Was this meant to be? Some say this is a fad. and can’t do any long term damage. Others say this might be helpful to many. “Our lives are a narrative, a story, that many want to understand.” says one streamer. Was it meant to be? Who knows. But it is the new thing. Whether it sticks around will be anyones guess. 
Right now the Protocol is negotiating for access to some of these videos and soon you will be able to judge for yourself.

 

 

 

 

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An itinerant worker within the film industry who suffers from cinemaphobia. He's our editor so send all grammatical and spelling errors to him. He is currently enrolled in a Spell Check class.

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